WHO are u?

One of my homies is...to say it frankly, a manipulative, conniving jerkoff. The only thing is, everyone, myself included thinks he's a really good guy. Deep down. Somewhere. It's like he's two different people. He's capable of doing some of the nicest sh*t ever, and would truly kill a man for one of us, but he's also capable of doin some of the most disrespectful sh*t to us, and other people he cares about. Therein lies the conundrum. We had a somewhat "intervention" with him the other day where everyone got the opportunity to air out their grievances, and it occurred to me just after the conversation, that it wasn't the first time we had this kind of conversation with him, and it's not seeming like he's really doing anything to change. Do I think he's a good guy? Yes. But when I think about what he does, not only to us, but other people that he cares about, it makes you wonder which person is the real him?

This is opening my eyes, because I was (and honestly sometimes still am) like that. When I took a step back and examined my actions, it seemed like I was nicer to those that I didn't know than those that I did. I've heard that family are the ones that can hurt you the most, I'm assuming because they know the most about you and you allow yourself to become emotionally vulnerable around them. I know there were some cases where I definitely took advantage of that, and I'm not proud of it. It wasn't until I was put in a situation that I was forced to deal with the consequences of my actions toward those I "cared" about, that I truly made an effort to change.

I hope that he doesn't place himself in a situation where he has to learn the lesson the hard way like I did, but he is a bit older than me and they say it is hard to teach an old dog new tricks. I love him to death and look at him almost like a big brother to me, but I can feel myself beginning to feed him with a long-handed spoon and I don't like the guard I find myself putting up when he comes around or we talk. I almost want to sit him down and ask once and for all...homie...WHO ARE U?!