Ho-Hum Birthday

My birthday was, to say the least, lackluster. I can come up with a bunch of bullsh*t reasons, but I know the real reason why. When you've been in a relationship for a long time (about 7 years in my case), when you break up, I mean really break up, it's extremely difficult to move on. I thought I had for the most part been able to at least deal with what I had done to put myself in this position and swallow the pill that the story of me and her won't end like a fairy tale, but it is just so d@mn hard. When you've gone through every significant event in your young adulthood with someone, there is a HUGE hole to fill when that person is gone. I've tried to fill that hole with positive things, like increased contact with family, working out, handling business, but if I learned anything today, that strategy isn't working. In the back of my mind, I hoped that maybe she would send a text or call, not to say anything more than happy birthday, but I know that is selfish of me to even hope that she would do that despite what I did. Today was actually pretty busy for me, because there was a lot of work to do, but there was definitely something (or more accurately someone) missing. Today isn't going down in my own personal history as "one to remember", I sincerely hope this is one I forget, the sooner the better.