Time Waits For No One...

Got invited to a wedding by one of the homies from college. That's the 3rd one that is getting/has been married. Starting to feel like maybe I should be looking for a wife. But then again, I've always felt like what's for me is for me...

It's funny because when I was in college, I was dating my ex through most of it, everyone said I would be the first to get married. Now here we are a few years later, and I'm starting to feel like the george clooney of the crew. No wifey, no girlfriend, no baby mama, NOTHIN. While I do enjoy the benefits of my very single status, a part of me thinks that finding a wife and getting married is part of growing up. Almost like I can't be a "grown ass man" fareal until I have a wife and children.

I don't get any pressure from my fam or anything like that...it's just me being my own worst critic again...My wife is out there. I may or may not have met her, but I do know that God has made her for me and I for her. Besides, I'm only goin through that marriage fiasco ONCE, so damn right I'll take my time...

Real Love

At work today, I ran into a bubbly young lady who absolutely lit up my day. Actually she wasn't young, she was in fact a grandmother, but she had the energy of a 13 year old. Her vibe was absolutely contagious. I told her how great her spirit was and she said her mother told her that if you can't put a smile on someone's face every day, then you might as well be dead. She then brought over her husband who was just as affable. He and I spoke for about 30 minutes about his flight and then about his wife. He told me that he had met his wife when he was interviewing people to be his assistant. He said that by the end of the interview, he knew she was the one and actually gave her a kiss on the cheek and said he would call her the next day. Needless to say he hired her and the rest was history. He said his wife told him to quit his job and start a company. She said he would make a little less money the first year, but after that he would make more money than he ever had. He was scared, but he trusted her. She helped him start his company and sure enough everything she said came true. He ended up by saying that he owes all of his success to her and has been very happily married with her for 42 years and counting. He said he loves her as much today as the first time he met her.

Just meeting those two made me hopeful. After spending 5 minutes with them both, you could tell that those two were just MEANT to be together. I hope to one day have that kind of love for myself. While "dating" is fun for a while, I know the happiest moments in my life have been the ones that I have been able to share with a significant other. I believe that kind of love is out there for everyone. I guess you just have to be ready for it when it comes along. I hope I will be...

Cheaters

At my job, I've noticed that most of the guys that work there are married with children. And from what it seems, happily married. Working at the airport, you see beautiful women all over the place. Hartsfield is the busiest airport in the world, so as you can expect, beautiful people from all over the country fly through daily. What I can't understand is virtually all of the married men are so openly "thirsty" after other women. Telling me how to get numbers without appearing to be flirting and the like. I make an effort to not venture to assume anything about the status of their marriages, but I do question how you are bold enough to "holla" with a wedding ring on.

While I was in college, my ex and I wore something akin to promise rings on our wedding fingers (I had discussed to her a friend of mine that was doing that and she suggested we do the same...long story short). Me personally, I felt that the ring was a constant reminder of her. We were dating long distance at the time, and I kind of felt like Frodo from Lord of the Rings, when I put the ring on she was watching me. Needless to say, there was no cheating during that time (could have also been to us still being in the somewhat honeymoon period, but that's neither here nor there).

Let me qualify by saying that I have cheated in the past. But I won't go as far as saying that I am a cheater (I believed I addressed this in an earlier blog). But one thing that I know I will not do is cheat on my wife. I've had this conversation with a few friends of mine who also agree that they will not cheat on their wife. Most of the thinking behind this I've found is based on the idea that marriage is a vow before God, thus it is placed on a higher pedestal than dating someone (most men do value marriage more than women think they do btw).

Now I've heard the "once a cheater, always a cheater" and "you can't teach an old dog new tricks", but I disagree with the premise that people don't change. I agree that you can't change people, but that doesn't mean that they cannot change themselves. In fact, I believe people are in a perpetual state of change. When you fail to change, you begin to die. I also believe anyone can change anything they want to about themselves, with hard work, determination, and God.

I haven't discussed this much with women, so I don't know if they judge a difference between say, dating someone for 2-3 years, and marrying them, but I will say that for most men, at least the ones that I know, there is a HUGE difference.